Saying Goodbye

This year has been a hard one. We have had too many good people taken away from us. We lost my father on the first day of the year, and now we lost Neil's dad. If this year has taught me anything, it's to love the ones around you fiercely. It's also taught me that showing up for people in times of need is so important. We once again have had so many good friends show up for us. 
Terry, or to us, Gramps, was a humble and honest man. He apologized when he messed up. He laughed at the smallest jokes, and found joy in the simplest things. He loved his sons and grandson fiercely, and showed it unapologetically. He was selfless in that he made sacrifices for those that he loved and worked hard without complaint to make life easier for those around him. 
I'll never forget that he was the first person in Neil's family to tell me that he loved me, and he told me every day. He called me annoyingly too often, he showed up at my door way too much, and he drove me crazy sometimes, but he did it all to make sure that we all knew that he loved us. I'm so heartbroken that my beautiful boy who loved his Gramps will grow up without him. He just started to say his name correctly... because the GR combo can be hard. He still looks for his car pulling up in the driveway. How do you tell a toddler who doesn't understand why he isn't coming back? It's been eight months since my dad died, and I still don't know. It's still no easier. We were not expecting this, and we had so many plans. We planned to ride the ferry. We planned to take him to see monster trucks. We planned to fight over if Terry could take him fishing. (A fight he likely would have won.) I'll miss the "hey darlin" phone calls, the "am I HAIRassing you?" as he pulls on my hair, and most of all watching him with his grandson.